On my recent visit to my mum in Montreal, I discovered yet again that both she and my sister were definitely the worse for wear when it came to their hearing. Both have been tested recently and BOTH are supposed to get fitted for hearing aids; my mum, simply because she is 84 (and given that is probably one of the few things that are failing, I want her constitution!), and my sister because she has been plagued with hearing issues on and off her entire life.
But the exchange below was not untypical this past weekend:
(I'm in the kitchen, working flour and butter with my hands as I make pastry for a yummy brandied nut tart – shoot me an email if you want the recipe to my mother down the hallway in her room) –
Me: Mum, do you have a pastry cutter?
Me: Pastry cutter! Do you have a pastry cutter?
Mum: Eh? What are you saying? A tea towel?
Me: NO. A pastry cutter- I need a pastry cutter!
Mum: I have LOTS of tea towels, - they’re in the linen closet –
Siobhan, get Sheenagh a Tea towel!
Siobhan: (in computer room across from mum’s) – What?
Mum: A tea towel – get sheenagh some tea towels!
Me: I don’t want tea towels – I want a pastry cutter!
Siobhan: Eh? What does she want?
Mum: TEA TOWELS
Siobhan: A bowl – a large bowl?
Me: NO. A pastry cutter, Bins, I need a pastry cutter.
Mum: Siobhan- get Sheenagh some tea towels!!
Siobhan: OK< I’ll get the bowl, hang on.
(Walks bye me where I”m howling with laughter in the kitchen, trying to reiterate I need a PASTRY CUTTER)
Siobhan rummages in the pantry, brings out a big steel bowl and brings it to me.
Siobhan: Here you are.
Siobhan: What’s so funny?
Me: I needed a pastry cutter!
I give up and finish the pastry by hand.